Episode
Two:
<Previously
on Cyberland>
Type:
The roommates moved in, but two were missing the first day. Edwin and Scott got
off on the wrong foot. The webmates sat and waited for Beth and Joe to arrive,
they talked about sex.
Beth:
Damn, I feel like I'm late to the party! Here I am, Beth... I don't even know
where to begin... so here are some of my vitals. I'm 20... a Rhetoric major (I
have NO idea what I'm going to do with that degree) at the University of
Illinois... born and raised amidst the corn and soybean fields of central
Illinois. Right now (and for the whole summer) I'm living in Orlando, FL… My
freshman year at UIUC I did their College Program (the best four months of my
life... so far) where I worked in Epcot Center as a merchandise hostess and body
painter (not as kinky as it sounds). I just wanna say Hola and I look forward to
joining in the fun.
Joe:
I'm here now! And I'm ready to party...
Philip:
Welcome aboard...the party's just started.
Joe:
Well it looks like Elizabeth and I are the last two in the house... does that
mean we have to share the room with the bunk beds? Anyway, I think everybody
sounds very cool and I can’t wait to hangout with you guys some more.
Beth:
I get the top bunk!
Philip:
Hey! Nice to have you around.
Colleen:
So... I must ask… am I the only one to have an "alternative"
lifestyle? Yep, I'm gay. That’s one of those things I just like to get out in
the open. It was on my earlier post, but I thought this deserved it's own space
who has thoughts?
Joe (Confessional):
Colleen, seems nice. I knew somebody here would be gay.
Philip:
I'm straight... but… Apparently, I have a "gay walk." I would
literally walk down hallways & people near me would say "oh, he's
gay"... even if I'd never met the person before in my life. It was weird. I
do have friends who are homosexual, so I'm not a phobe. I have some concerns
with some behaviors that some people have when they say they're gay. Like an
overactive sex drive. I know people of all sexuality’s have raging hormones.
Edwin:
Philip, you are deadly accurate on your statement about how sexuality is all
about what goes on in the bedroom and not how you live your life. I am so happy
that you said that because that has enlightened me today beyond what I expected.
I really can't express how correct I think you are... I supposedly claim myself
to be a bisexual male although I am a virgin and haven't dated. But I have been
in love with both a man and a woman (not at the same time though)... so I know
that the feelings for each gender are pretty much equal and I could as easily
love anyone intimately and gender would not matter.
Colleen:
Edwin... I find that interesting... I'm of the school that the label
"bisexuality" is used because a person is just trying to get some, is
trying to be trendy, or it's just a person's way to deal with being gay. I don't
deny that there are many different levels of a person's sexuality, but the term
"bisexuality" has just become too trendy and it's given the gay
community a bad name.
Edwin:
I am who I am and I try never to place a label on myself... let's just say that
I declare free love and let's ditch the term bisexual.
Edwin (Confessional):
Ever since the one person I thought I can trust on this board has shown
discouragement on my current label, it has flung me into a
Scott:
Well, Colleen, I am not either.
Edwin (Excerpt from
Journal): I am bisexual and I feel very
threatened about being attacked because I am who I am. You can argue about why I
am and what happened along the process, but just don’t attack me and be very
prejudiced. Ever since the Matthew Shepard murder, I feel insecure about being
me… in fact, now I seem to be hiding it. I know that I can be persecuted for
just be being me…
Renee:
Well, I would consider myself straight. If I had to pick a favorite sex in terms
of lovemaking and marriage, it would definitely have to be a man. However, I
would not be afraid to kiss a girl or anything. I have, actually, but it was
within the context of a coed spin the bottle game during my freshman year of
college. I like to live the saying, "straight, but not narrow." It
does sadden me that much of society would consider Colleens lifestyle
"alternative." I would never think of that lifestyle as being
alternative, but an equally "normal" (my most un-favorite word) way of
choosing to live.
Scott (Confessional):
Holy hell! Renee rocks my face and she is totally awesome! I love and admire her
openness and we have lots in common it seems already. I truly appreciate her
honesty and her sense of self to not hold back in our conversations and tell me
anything, despite what others might think of her… or even us... since we seem
to be the partiers and the non-straight edge ones. I just dig her and what she
is all about. I have a feeling we will become good friends and that makes me
extremely excited to get to know her better.
Philip:
Colleen, What made you realize that you were a lesbian?
Colleen:
Oh God... that's a question that brings back amazing memories... To be honest, I
fell in love. Head over heels, flat out in love with the most amazing girl. I
was 15, she was 17. Before that, I had kinda known that I was different, but
with Jen, it all made sense. We were at camp, and to this day, looking at her
picture still brings back something in me. It was though, another year and a
half before I really "came out".
***
Josie:
My fiancé’s father called me up at 3 am and screamed at me for about 5
minutes... just out of the blue, about how I can't marry his son… Yeah. OK.
We're getting married on July 24th, and if you're not there, it is your loss. Go
out and drink or something, I COULD GIVE A S***.
Philip:
What did his father yell at you about? Anything specific or just that you
shouldn't marry his son?
Josie:
Well, this is an ongoing thing... I'm not a Serb or even Eastern European... and
that's a big problem for his entire family. He was brought up his whole life
being told he must marry a Serbian girl, which is a bit farfetched considering
they live in the United States. That's basically it... the wedding is drawing
nearer and nearer and I keep getting heat... none of them are coming to the
wedding. It's aggravating, but I've lived with this since we got engaged...
everything was ok until we were officially getting married. It truly sucks, but
this is the life… that I have chosen, so for his sake I must deal with it.
He's worth the aggravation and psychosis his parents have inflicted on me. If he
wasn't, we wouldn’t be having this problem, because I would have left ages
ago....
Philip:
I don't know where Darius lives now, but unless it's culturally diverse, where
do they expect him to find a "nice, down-home Serbian girl"?
Renee:
Take all the time you need Josie. What a level head you have on your shoulders.
I hope I will one-day find a guy of whom I can speak as highly as you speak of
your fiancé. I am sorry about your would be father in law... it must be very
difficult for you and your fiancé. I feel for ya, honey.
Josie:
Thanks Renee babe... if you think I’ve got beef with my father in law, wait
till you see how well I get along with my sister in law, Tjana... I've taken
that bitch down more times than I can count. What makes me laugh is that they
are all big churchgoing people... once I was really pissed and I screamed at
them... I was like "Those who condemn others for their race religion or
nationality burn in hell just as fast as your other perceived 'sinners'
"... it’s all lost on them. Idiots.
Scott:
One thing I have to say though, is that you sound extremely confident, like you
know what you want and you will not allow anyone to interfere in your own
happiness and in your life goals. That is totally frickin’ awesome and I
really admire that in you!
Philip:
Josie, I still think that's so neat that you are getting married so soon. What
do you think is the one thing that pulls you & Dar together... and has led
you to get married?
Josie:
That’s actually a pretty hard question to answer. There are tons of things
that really draw me to Dar... his infinite patience with everyone (including
children), his easygoing, happy-go-lucky nature, which scarily balances out my
somewhat cynical personality... and his sense of humor… He's the closest human
being I can ever like to an angel... He is everything I've ever dreamed of or
hoped for... and I can’t wait to start my life as his wife. Our relationship
isn’t perfect, but our fights seldom last more then 10 minutes... And our
fights usually aren't all that heavy, except when we are on the subject of his
parents... They could have been the fatal flaw in our relationship, but we're
tougher than that...
Philip:
Scott, what's with the famous stripper wish?
Scott:
Well, I was waiting for somebody to finally bring that up. Well, when I wrote
the application for Cyberland I never, ever imagined that it would ever be used
for other people to see. I just thought I’d put something light hearted and
kinda funny because I thought everyone else would maybe be putting serious
answers. Anyways, to finally answer your question, I really don't even know if
that would be my wish. I seriously doubt it, but I do admit that I think it
would be fun to do it. And hey, they get a lot of money. I don't know if I would
do it all the way, or just to a thong or something. Well, ya, it would just be
fun I think, that’s all, and I don’t want to sound conceded, please, I’m
really not, but having a swimmer's body and build I think I could do it and I
know I am not shy...
Scott (Excerpt From
Journal): I am very, very
straightforward and with me, what I say is what I mean, unlike many people here.
I am not about playing games with my words or my actions and people here are…
like nobody really, really knows themselves because so many here are trying to
conform to what they think they should BE in order to fit in here. I am so not
about fitting in, I will be myself no matter what... and what’s important is
what I do, or what comes out of my mouth, not what I wear or how I talk.
Joe (Confessional):
Ok, to me Scott is the stud of the board. I mean he wants to be a stripper! He
seems like someone I can party with… He seems complex and I like people who
are complex. I don’t like to judge people on their looks but I'm human so I
do, but when I meet someone who shows me there is more than meets the eye, I
become fascinated by them. He is one of those people.
Renee:
I hear ya Scott... However degrading it sounds, nothing would turn me on more
than to have a bunch of people staring at me while I do a striptease… I love
when people watch me too... I especially love dancing. I am really good too. I
just love everything about being sexy with that "looky, no touchy"
attitude.
Scott:
S--- Renee! Ok, this is so not fair... No I really want to go dancing at a hot
club too... Ya, we could totally both wear sexy stuff, and just work it all
night long… Have you ever been to a rave? They have real hard core techno
stuff there and it’s fun. I’ve been to two raves and next one I go to in SF
I’m dressing up for and looking really wacked out. Do you like that stuff at
all? I’ve never done it, but I am so pumped for it, it'll be awesome... I only
wish you were gonna be there too…
Renee (Confessional):
Scott and Joe look pretty cute...
Renee:
I would go to a rave in a second, though I know I would be intimidated at first.
Some of my closest friends at school are really into that scene, and I am
intrigued by it too, but mostly as an observer. I would go and just dance the
night away and not do any drugs or anything. However, I am really interested in
trying Ecstasy. My best friend here at home has recently done it a few times,
and I am now totally curious too. I want to wait until I am in the right
environment and with the right guy so I can get the WHOLE experience if you know
what I mean.
Scott:
Ya, a rave would be so much fun, I actually wouldn't do drugs either, but I so
don't care if others do or not. Well, I’d probably drink before it, just for
fun, ya know, and that would loosen me up. It would definitely be interesting,
as for me, I don't know if I would do ecstasy, but I do understand your notion
on the WHOLE experience baby, and I agree with you on that one...
Josie (Confessional):
Well I haven't really known anyone on here long enough to judge true character,
but I saw something on the board before that kind of disturbed me. Renee was
talking about wanting to try ecstasy, and Scott was all agreeing with her and
stuff. I didn't think they were that type, and maybe I'm jumping the gun, but I
remember when I was 20, I wasn’t really curious about that, even though I was
in college in NY and that stuff was readily available to me. Maybe I'm just
feeling my age here, but I always saw drugs as an escape from life for
emotionally weak people. I really believe that Scott and Renee aren't like that,
but I'm just worried for them that the experimentation will be too much of a
temptation. They are better people than that…
<End
of Episode Two>
On
the Next Cyberland:
Joe wants to have a party on the board, but how without any beer? And after a night or partying in her home town one of Renee’s dreams come true… and the webmates judge her harshly.